There are many who think that jokes about dogs are the lowest form of humor. But, when it comes to getting lots of laughs and making people happy – nothing beats a good old-fashioned dog joke! A really funny one at that (unless you like cats)!
That’s why we’ve compiled this list with 60 fascinating dog jokes. The next time your friends start rating breeds according to how much they resemble their owner’s personality traits or complaining about doorbell labs being too noisy in order to get pizza delivery before 2pm; tell them “You’re barking up wrong tree”.
So, are you looking for the best jokes about dogs? If so then this is exactly what your search needed. From pugs to labs and everything in between there’s a joke that will make anyone laugh! Read up on these hilarious animal-based puns today–you won’t regret it.
Dogs are man’s best friends. They always have our backs, and they don’t even mind if we fart in front of them! But the truth is that dogs can do more than make us laugh–they’re also really smart animals who love playing games together or taking care of their owners while they sleep (something called “protecting” a human). However, that does not mean we should not laugh at the expenses of the dogs.
Whether you’re telling one of these good dog jokes at school, or texting a few to your buddies—get ready for an awesome reaction!
Some of these dog jokes are silly, some are gross, but they’re all guaranteed to make everyone in the room howl with delight. If you like laughing (and who doesn’t?), then these jokes are for YOU!
1. Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings?
It’s hardly ever for them.
2. Why are dogs like phones?
Because they have collar IDs!
3. What kind of dog likes taking a bath?
a shampoodle!
4. Why do dogs run in circles?
Because it’s hard to run in squares!
5. What do you call a dog magician?
A labracadabrador.
6. What do you get when you cross a sheepdog with a rose?
A collie-flower!
7. What type of markets do dogs avoid?
Flea markets!
8. What do you get when you cross a racing dog with a bumblebee?
A greyhound buzz!
9. What breed of dog does Dracula have?
A Bloodhound!
10. Why did the snowman name his dog “Frost”?
Because “Frost” bites!
11. Why are dogs like phones?
Because they have collar IDs.
12. What dog keeps the best time?
A watch dog!
13. What do you get when you cross a cocker spaniel, a poodle, and a rooster?
A cockerpoodledoo!
14. Why is a tree like a big dog?
They both have a lot of bark!
15. Which dog breed absolutely LOVES living in the city?
A New Yorkie!
16. What do you get when you cross a dog with a phone?
A golden receiver!
17. Where do you find a dog with no legs?
Right where you left him!
18. Why aren’t dogs good dancers?
Because they have two left feet!
19. What did one flea say to the other?
Should we walk or take a dog?
20. Why should you be careful when it rains cats and dogs?
Because you might step in a poodle!
21. What did the waiter say to the dog when he brought out her food?
Bone appetit!
22. Why was the dog sweating so much?
She was a hot dog!
23. How are a dog and a marine biologist alike?
One wags a tail and the other tags a whale!
24. Why can’t dogs work the DVD remote?
Because they always hit the paws button!
25. What do you call a great dog detective?
Sherlock Bones!
26. How do fleas travel from place to place?
By itch-hiking!
27. Which dog breed does Dracula love the most?
Blood hounds!
28. What’s a dog’s favorite dessert?
Pupcakes!
29. What kinds of stores do dogs love the most?
Re-tail stores!
30. What’s a dog’s favorite kind of pizza?
Pupperoni pizza!
31. Which dog breed chases anything that’s red?
A bull dog!
32. What’s a dog’s favorite instrument?
A trombone!
33. What did the hungry Dalmatian say after his meal?
“That hit the spots!”
34. What type of market should you NEVER take your dog?
A flea market!
35. What do you call it when a cat wins a dog show?
A CAT-tastrophy!
36. What do you call a dog that’s been out in the cold?
A pupsicle!
37. What do you do if a dog chews your dictionary?
Take the words right out of his mouth!
38. Which breed of dog is the quietest?
A hush puppy!
39. Which dog breed just LOVES bubble baths?
A shampoodle!
40. What did the dog say to the flea?
Quit bugging me!
41. What’s a dog’s favorite breakfast food?
Pooched eggs!
42. Why did the Dalmatian go to the eye doctor?
He kept seeing spots!
43. What does a dog get when she finishes obedience school?
Her pet-degree!
44. Think these jokes are funny?
Check out this video of a talking Husky that will have you keeling over with giggles.
45. “We’re eating dinner soon.Don’t fill up on homework.” -Dog mom
46. Why did the man living in Alaska name his dog Frost?
Because Frost bites.
47. How are dog catchers in the UK paid?
By the pound.
48. When the dog went to the flea circus, what happened?
He stole the show
49. What could be more incredible than a talking dog?
A spelling bee
50. Why do dogs love smartphones?
Because they have collar IDs.
51. What do dogs owned by chemists do with their bones?
They barium
52. What do dogs usually like to eat at the movie theaters?
Pupcorn
53. Which dog breed enjoys a good relaxing bubble bath?
A shampoodle
54. What kind of dog doesn’t make any sound?
A hush puppy
55. What would you call a dog who lives in New York?
A Yorkie
56. What kind of dog is an expert in telling the time?
A watchdog
57. Why did the dog want to cross the road?
To get to the barking lot
58. What’s a dog’s favorite fashion magazine?
Vanity Fur
59. What’s a dog’s favorite movie?
Jurassic Bark
