When your husband says he has a big plans for you tomorrow he means he needs help cleaning the gutters. These 20 funny tweets by hysterical wives deserve your laugh.
1.
he’s trying to be sweet by offering to do the shopping but my husbands a damned fool if he thinks im giving up my alone time wandering the grocery store
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) August 22, 2020
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I sent my husband a flirty pic while he was at work. When he got home, he asked me why I sent it. So yes, the flame of our attraction is still burning strong.
— 🤶🎄Raw Motherhood🎄🤶 (@MetteAngerhofer) August 25, 2020
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My husband just said that “we” are going to start eating healthier.
Still haven’t found who tf he’s talking to.
— Arianna Bradford (@thearibradford) August 12, 2020
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Husband, “I want to sleep in so don’t wake me up in the morning.”
Me, waking him up at 1:00 pm, “Good morning sunshine!”
Husband, “WHY DID YOU LET ME SLEEP SO LONG?”— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) August 29, 2020
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I put on my husband’s deodorant and now I’m angry at the way I load the dishwasher.
— Laura Marie (@lmegordon) August 29, 2020
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Told my husband I had WAP waiting when he got home and now he’s eating macaroni and not speaking to me.
— Maryfairyboberry🧚🏻♀️ (@maryfairybobrry) August 21, 2020
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My husband pissed me off so I bought another half-dozen throw pillows for our bed.
— 🎭ᑌᖇᔕᑌᒪᗩ🎭 (@3sunzzz) August 9, 2020
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If you have to tell your wife “it was a joke,” it’s already too late. Godspeed.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) September 9, 2020
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Husband: Stop introducing me as your first husband.
— Obviously Everyone… (@OMGSoOverIt) September 6, 2020
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19.
Marriage is just screaming louder than your spouse to tell them to stop yelling
— Maryfairyboberry🧚🏻♀️ (@maryfairybobrry) August 8, 2020
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21.
No one tells you this before you get married but it’s really hard work bossing someone around all the time
— JPo (@Peauxtassium) August 23, 2020
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23.
My husband and I played Rock Paper Scissors to see who had to clean up the dog shit so don’t tell me romance is dead
— Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) August 20, 2020
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Can you get me something while you’re up?
-Me to my husband even though he’s not up.
— Jingle Bell Jawbreaker 🎄 (@sixfootcandy) August 28, 2020
