Even a bad joke is a joke, therefore it is sacrosanct. Some stupid jokes are actually so funny that they can get even the most serious person laughing.
Read up on our stupid jokes and send them to your friends who are deeply committed to ridiculousness.
1. I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I’ll let you know.
2. I didn’t want to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a traffic cop, but when I got home, all the signs were there.
3. When I was a kid, my mother told me I could be anyone I wanted to be. Turns out, identity theft is a crime.
4. What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing, they fast!
5. What happens when you go to the bathroom in France? European.
6. Why did the old man fall in the well? Because he couldn’t see that well!
7. Why do dogs float in water? Because they are good buoys.
8. What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee fish!
9. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
10. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
11. Student: “Can I go to the bathroom?”
Teacher: “It’s ‘may.'”
Student: “No, it’s January.”
12. What do you call a sad cup of coffee? Depresso
13. My wife told me I had to stop acting like a flamingo. So I had to put my foot down!
14. I tell dad jokes but I have no kids…I’m a faux pa!
15. If you see a robbery at an Apple Store does that make you an Witness?!
16. My uncle named his dogs Rolex and Timex. They’re his watch dogs!
17. I’ll call you later. Don’t call me later, call me Dad!
18. What do you call a fish with no eyes?
19. There are three types of people in the world:
Those who can count and those who can’t.
20. What is Forrest Gump’s email password?
21. Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke?
He won the “no-bell” prize.
22. What’s the difference between a rabbit and a plum?
They’re both purple except for the rabbit.
23. I like elephants.
Everything else is irrelephant.
24. Two guys walk into a bar.
The third guy ducks.
25. Why do Norwegian ships havs barcodes on them?
So when they return to port they can Scandinavian